Many of us have a celebrity hall pass or have at least joked about having the green light from our partner to have sex with a famous person of our choosing (which, in my case, thankfully, has moved on from my Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman, Dean Cain fantasy). And while for mere mortals (like me), the likelihood of this ever actually happening is pretty much non-existent (even with Dean), I have wondered what if the opportunity did present itself? What would or could happen?  What is your ayurvedic body type? Like what you see? Sign up to our bodyandsoul.com.au newsletter for more stories like this Like Rick and Fred (Owen Wilson and Jason Sudeikis) in the movie Hall Pass, can you actually act on (or attempt to action) one? Or is it something we just say in jest? And if it is all a big joke, should we actually be making light of this situation in the first place? According to Lauren Bradley, relationship counsellor from Love Therapy Australia, there isn’t a one-size-fits-all answer; instead, it’s a mutual understanding between you and your partner. “Good relationships are founded on a solid shared understanding of the boundaries and what it takes to break them. It’s important that you and your partner have the same understanding of what a hall pass means within the relationship, even if it’s just for laughs or the commitment and trust between you and your partner could be irreparably severed,” she says. And this understanding should begin with a shared definition of exactly who or what your hall pass entails. “‘Usually, a hall pass is a specific person, like a celebrity, or a single one-night-stand with a stranger for a special occasion,” Bradley explains.  It is also important to look deeper and explore with your partner what doing this will actually mean. “The idea of a hall pass versus the reality of you actually sleeping with someone else could generate two very different experiences for your partner. You want to make sure that your partner is both okay with the idea and the reality of a hall pass,” Bradley says. Everyones boundaries are different, it’s important to communicate yours. Image: Pexels The key to this is communication. “It’s important you let your partner know first before jumping their bones!” she says. “Communicate with your partner around the opportunity, seek their consent, and clarify what exactly you’re allowed to do with your hall-pass lover.”  And while it may not be for everyone, those who do give their hall pass the go-ahead can find the experience beneficial in a range of ways. “Monogamy forever is tough, so many relationships look outside the box for variety and sustainability, including opening up options for extracurricular sexual endeavours like a hall pass.   Having a hall pass can create new memories and experiences to bring back into your relationship or support you with the feeling of stagnation in monogamy,” says Bradley.  It can also offer the opportunity for sanctioned sexual exploration. “We can’t provide our partner with everything, so opening up options allows for a broader sexual experience and potentially greater satisfaction. Non-heterosexual conforming people who find themselves in a heterosexual monogamous relationship may thrive with a little exploration outside of the relationship to account for the sides of their sexuality that may not be being satisfied by their partner.” Boundaries around hall passes need to be set. Image: Pexels For anyone looking to explore their hall pass, Bradley advises the following: Talk to your partner about your idea to freshen things up by opening the relationship for a specific hall pass experience Set really clear boundaries for what is and what isn’t acceptable – and for seeking additional approval, should the experience actually come to life If you’re nervous to ask your partner alone, couples counselling can provide a safe and supportive environment to communicate what your needs are within the relationship And for those of us who aren’t quite ready to be walking the halls in this way yet but who have mentioned doing so to our partners jokingly (guilty), Bradley says it is critical to make sure your partner finds your joke just as funny as you do. “If you are joking around that someone you know is your hall pass, and it makes your partner uncomfortable, this could really break the trust in your relationship, leaving your partner doubtful of your fidelity,” she says. “Teasing and taunting your partner that you want to jump the fence and bang the neighbour, isn’t funny. It’s just cruel.” Because as the saying goes, whether it’s your neighbour or Jason Momoa, all jokes have an element of truth in them, and for some of us in a relationship, this can be hard to hear.

So, is it ever OK to have a hall pass?